I have been seeing my psychologist now for over three years. I find him to be very helpful and mindful of the good things I am working on. Unfortunately, he has decided to pursue a relationship with a friend of mine. They are both single, and although I am happy for her, I’m wondering if it is right for me to continue to go to him for therapy. It just feels very strange and I’m very confused. I care about them both. I want to keep seeing him, but it just feels very weird. What do you recommend?
Your confusion is entirely appropriate… You’ve had a successful therapeutic relationship with your psychologist for over 3 years. Now all of a sudden he decides to pursue a relationship with one of your friends. There might be some ethical issues for him to consider depending the State in which he practices psychology. As for you, it comes down to a couple of basic choices:
The first one is to attempt to deal with your feelings about him dating your friend within the therapeutic relationship. A word of caution however… Do you wish to be spending your hard earned money in therapy talking about HIS girlfriend? If the answer is no, or you’ve tried doing that with no successful resolution then you’re left with only one other choice.
Terminate your relationship with him and seek to find another psychologist without all these complications. Believe me, he’s not the only good mental health provider around.
Elia Gourgouris Ph.D.